It’s always hard saying goodbye. I’m not entirely sure why we take our time to adventure, but one of the reasons, I think, is that we don’t know how to say goodbye. And that’s why it’s hard. I don’t think that making it easier would make it any less painful, but like anything in life, we can be good at it if we practice perfectly. Practice doesn’t necessarily improve our ability, it only provides the opportunity. So here are 2 things I have learned to do to make saying goodbye easier.
Think of life in cycles, not lines.
It’s a big concept to comprehend, but when you think of time, do you imagine it as a line from one point to the other? Or do you imagine it as a circle, where there is no beginning or end? When we think of time as a line, we begin to believe that if a moment has passed, well, then it’s in the past. When something is in our past, we believe that it is beyond our ability to reach, except through discussion and stories. But what if time was not a straight line, but more like a clock? At the point of 2 o clock, you had a missed opportunity and it comes and goes. Now, it’s in your past, but wait a little while and you find that moment comes right back around in your life. This is time as a cycle, rather than a line.
When you begin to think in circles, rather than lines, you can then see them everywhere. The analog clock. The moon. A woman’s reproductive rhythm. 12 months in a year. The stars and synodic patterns. Generational theory. Our eyes. Seasons of Spring Summer Fall Winter. What has been will yet be again. It’s holy.
After you think of time as momentous points upon that cycle, you can take a deep breath (breathing is also a circle) and then tell yourself “goodbye” to that moment, only secure that you will experience it again. Of course, much will change, and morph over time, but the moment will still be there. Oh and by the way, you will also change by the time you arrive.
Now, it can be easier to say good bye. Well, not really easier, but maybe not as difficult. What has been will yet be again. So, take a breath, receive a breath and say goodbye.